There was water everywhere; she was surrounded and gasping for air. She wasn’t quite sure why she was here or what had brought her here this time but she had a feeling she was too late. Her head rose to the surface, it was dark and she looked all around her. Why had she been summoned here? Amelia’s heart was racing, she was grateful she had learned to swim and spun around scanning the surface of water for a sign of life, or death. That was the tragedy of her life, sometimes she was too late.
Her eyes rose to the sky and then she saw the bridge. She saw a woman standing the wrong side of the concrete barrier and instantly she knew why she was here, but was she in time? Amelia couldn’t see her face, but she could see the silhouette of her body against the moonlight, and she assumed a look of shock on her face at Amelia’s appearance in the water.
‘Please just stay where you are, please, just wait for me to get up there,’ Amelia called out desperately.
Where was the bank? She didn’t have a clue how she was going to get out and she was feeling pretty tired. It had been a big day for her personally, and her dinner was now probably burning in the oven. However, this was the least of her concern; there was a young girl hanging on the edge of a bridge above her head that she needed to get to.
Time didn’t stop for anyone, and Amelia started swimming for the bank of the river. Although she could swim, Amelia wasn’t terribly fast but she did her best freestyle attempt for speed. She slid on the muddy bank of the river, and grabbed at some rocks and grass to help pull herself out of the water. Her clothes were heavy and weighing her down, it took every ounce of her strength to heave herself out.
Her lungs were tight as she scrambled up the bank: why couldn’t she had just dissipated to the bridge? She didn’t understand this weird and wonderful gift she had, not fully. When Amelia was younger she had assumed she was a ghost, there was nothing she could compare herself to. She had heard stories of ghosts appearing in places, so when she found herself in strange surroundings she just assumed it was part of her ghost life.
At a young age she learned not to talk to anyone else about it, she would get strange looks from her friends on the playground or would have others shout ‘liar’ at her. She had no control over the timing of the gift, she didn’t know when it would happen or where she would end up.
She remembered the moment she realised she was not a ghost, it was when she learned how to take a pulse. Amelia remembered with trepidation reaching for her wrist with two fingers, she was petrified of feeling nothing and felt a tremendous relief when she felt the thudding underneath her fingertips. She was alive! So if she wasn’t a ghost, what was she?
She was getting a stitch as she got to the top of the bank. She could see the stone arch bridge and the silhouette still standing there on the edge of the concrete barrier, the woman was clearly frozen to the spot. Amelia eased into a jog. She still wasn’t sure what her first words should be and it never got any easier. It usually came to her when she appeared, but this time she had been materialised far from the person she was meant to touch, and this time felt different.
She walked towards the silhouette as it slowly took shape and Amelia could see the mix of shock and fear in her face. Her pupils dilated in the middle of her deep blue eyes, they were fixed on Amelia and scanning her suspiciously.
‘It’s ok, I’m sorry if I scared you. I have a habit of doing that and I am sorry to intrude on your evening. I am Amelia, and you are?’ She spoke cautiously and calmly.
A frown took over from the mix of shock and fear, a frown of confusion etched on her forehead and each line leading to her golden hair which glistened in the moonlight. Amelia could see her white knuckles from the tight grip she had on the stone wall of the bridge. Amelia had been edging slowly towards the lady, and when she got close enough she gently held both of her hands. Her soothing energy spreading from her fingers and through to the women on the bridge.
‘I’m Ingrid,’ a lone tear fell from her eyes.
Ingrid felt the energy seep through her fingers, like a hug pulling her back together spreading from the inside out. She couldn’t explain it, but the energy made her weep. She turned to Amelia and held her as Amelia pulled Ingrid over the railings and held her tight. Amelia felt something she had not felt before, an energy return of sorts that seemed to complete her cells but she did not know what it was. So much of her life was unexplained that she just accepted the energy and stroked Ingrids hair.
‘How did you appear in the water?’ Ingrid was confused. One minute she was about to jump, it was a still evening and the water was serene beneath her, like a smooth pane of glass. She felt a moments peace, knowing it was all about to be over and then suddenly she heard thrashing and the water rippled, it’s calmness lost.
‘It’s extremely complicated, and I will explain, but we have more important things to realise first, like why you were standing on the edge of the bridge,’ Amelia had the most tranquil voice which eased Ingrids anxiety.
Ingrid studied Amelia’s face, it was so kind and warm. Her green eyes were so naturally sympathetic, like they belonged to Mother nature herself with a deep forrest green of empathy. She couldn’t describe it, and although Ingrid had always been so naturally trusting in her life, she felt an instant faith in Amelia.
‘I just want it to stop. My head, my thoughts… it’s all so overwhelming and I am just useless… I have no purpose, no meaning. I don’t know why I am here. I’m just so incongruous,’ she wept into Amelia’s shoulder and pulled at her tee.
‘Ingrid, I am about to do something and I promise you I will not hurt you. I call it a regeneration, it won’t take the pain away right now but it will help you make some decisions and usually I would have done this the moment I made contact with you earlier, but the whole water thing threw me off,’ Amelia smiled warmly, her dark curls falling over her eyes.
Ingrid slowly nodded, she hadn’t planned much beyond the bridge and right now she was numb, broken into tiny shards of glass and not sure how she was going to put herself back together again. Amelia leant forward, she placed her hands around Ingrids and felt the same sensation again which had stopped her before, the energy from Ingrid flowed through Amelia’s skin and felt as though it lifted every organ in her body and awoke her soul.
Amelia felt the emerald vibrant light shoot from the sky through the top of her head and charge her body before transferring to Ingrid. The connection was intense, and the warmth was more than Amelia had felt ever before. It was like she was super charged.
Ingrid felt her mind fill with past memories. It was like someone had switched a flickering light on, no, it wasn’t a flickering light… It was like watching an old cine film projecting on to the wall of her mind. She felt as though she was sitting in her own head. The bike she got when she was seven, peddling around the side street and laughing. Her beautiful mum calling her into the house for tea, her comforting voice and her reassuring hug. Then she was running around the school playground, laughing and tagging her friend Sarah before the memory dissolved and she was at high school winning the 800 metres.
Then she could see flickers, as though the reel had come to an end before a darkened picture appeared of her funeral. Her friends sitting with tears in their eyes. Their pain seared through her, their lives continuing and their guilt devastated her. She watched the emptiness open from her non existence. Then the reel seemed to end again, the flickering before a bright image beamed through.
She was standing with an image of light, her smile ran from ear to ear. Her heart raced, her soul was alive and the happiness overpowered her. She walked side by side, hand in hand with a force that she could not see. She felt a love she had not experienced before, a completeness with herself that oscillated outward and was greeted by a complimentary force which was the image of light by her side. The image was human shaped, female and was her equal, her enabler, her biggest cheerleader, her comfort and her divine sanctuary.
Amelia leapt back. She knew there was a different energy to Ingrid, but this was not possible and what she had seen could not happen.
‘What was that!?’ Ingrid exclaimed.
‘I like to call it a regeneration. It shows you what life is like both with you in it and without you in it. You were about to self destruct because of the insurmountable, and I am merely a vessel to show you that it is not going to be easy, but it will absolutely be worth it. I have learnt time and time again, people do not want their life to end, they just want the pain to stop. I don’t really know how, or why I am able to do this or even how I end up in the situations I am in, but I do know it is my absolute purpose to ensure a second chance.’
‘You’re like a superhero,’ Ingrid stuttered.
‘No, not at all. I was pretty young when it first happened. I was sitting in the front room watching Doctor Who, and next thing I was in the woods. There was a man in front of me tying some rope around a branch of a tree, he was standing on a chair and at first I didn’t know what was happening. It was the strangest thing and I thought I was dreaming.
I walked over to him, I am not even sure why I walked over to him but I felt compelled to. I asked him what he was doing, I had clearly startled him and his eyes looked so filled with pain. I felt drawn to him, I reached out for his hands and then I felt the emerald light come and the transfer. I don’t really know what happens other than people being shown that this feeling is temporary, it could be a temporary 6 months or a temporary 3 years and it will be hard. However, I know they get shown it is worth it and they are born again with a determination to get through the dark times. I know they are also shown the people that will be there for them, the ones that will lift them up without judgement.
I know they are also shown there is a lot of hard work they have to put in, a lot of introversion, reflection and rebuilding. An incredibly vulnerable and scary process that is ultimately the most courageous and powerful thing they will ever do. Everything from that point will be better, there will be relapses but they will have the tools to survive those relapses,’ Amelia couldn’t stop herself. She had never stayed to explain before. Normally she shared a few kind words and she dissipated back to where ever she was before.
‘That’s an incredible gift.’
‘Unfortunately there is only one of me, but I hope what I have shown others gives them the light to share. I like to think of it like a good bit of bacteria that can spread around the world, that we all have the power to do so much good. I can’t save everyone but for some reason there are certain people I am sent to… maybe those that feel they have no-one to reach out to, or those that are crying for help or screaming for it to stop. I don’t know why but I wish I could be omnipresent. I just know this is my purpose and I have to make sure I am there for as many people as I can. I just wish I knew how it happened so I could tap into it and be there for more people.’
Amelia couldn’t stop herself. Why was she opening up? Who was Ingrid and why could Amelia see herself in her images? She had never appeared in someones regeneration before, and she was bemused.
‘Why were you in my vision?’ Ingrid asked her.
Ingrid now held Amelia’s hands, both of them could not deny the energy that was flowing between them. The connection was overpowering, and Amelia did not want it. She could not focus on one person, and yet she wanted this. She was overwhelmed with how much she wanted to stay in Ingrids company. Why was she not dissipating?
Ingrid held her gaze, it was like she was in a trance and they moved towards each other. Slowly their mouths explored each other, the flow of the connection increasing and the emotion Amelia felt was incredible. Too incredible.
She pulled away, she felt dizzy and her chest felt compressed. She couldn’t breathe.
‘I can’t do this,’ she stuttered.
Ingrid kissed her again.
‘No. Stop. You can’t do this to me,’ Amelia cried. She felt like Ingrid was trespassing. She was a lone ranger in life, she was the strength to other people and she could not feel this. Ingrid was armed with a sledgehammer in her most vulnerable moment. But Amelia could not feel this, she did not want to feel this.
‘You have magical moments coming Ingrid, I saw them but don’t get confused as they are not meant to be with me. I can sense you have a genuine warmth and a beautiful soul. You have so much to give the world; you have endured so much pain and hardship and sacrificed so much for others. You are going to feel so much happiness and completeness, and yes, we both saw someone is coming after you find that. But it is not me, it can’t be me. For some reason I am really feeling your vision, I can feel that someone is coming and that moment will wrap you up, you must selfishly absorb the enriching and soul fulfilling moment, because you deserve it. You will experience eternal sunshine with that person, along with some clouds that you will sift through together but there is so much sunshine. My job in life is to make you see it and I don’t care who delivers it, as long as you receive it, because I can see you.’
Amelia couldn’t breathe properly. The phrase ‘I can see you’ overwhelmed her. She felt like she was losing her empathy, she had forgotten she had found Ingrid in truly dark place and she was meant to be helping her. But she couldn’t stay a minute longer, why wasn’t she dissipating!?
Ingrid felt the colour drain from her face and she watched as Amelia almost dissolved into thin air. Her particles flickering before disappearing completely. She dialled her brothers number and waited for him to arrive as she held her knees close to her chest and cried.
As Amelia appeared back in front of her oven, she could smell burning and realised yet another meal was ruined. She had never appeared in another persons foresight before, and she had never felt the extent of emotions during a vision. Usually, she watched from afar, almost like she was at the back of the room but this time it was like it was her own cine film playing. It was not possible, was this a new level of her gift? Was she now able to completely connect to the person she was sent to?
Three years later Amelia made the journey to Australia, she spent so much time dissipating around the world that she actually wanted some control and choice in the matter of travel. She finally got a passport and went to see the place on the opposite side of the planet. There was something quite comforting about the length of time it took to get there, it made Amelia feel alive and it felt like an adventure.
After leaving her luggage at the hotel she went for a walk through the city and caught a train to Richmond. She wandered around the sports stadiums, her head towards the sky as they all towered over her – it was like she was surrounded by a village for giants. She strolled by some nearby shops before jumping on the 78 tram, she was staring out the window before pulling on the chord suddenly for the tram to stop.
As the tram pulled up at the stop, Amelia walked off turning left and stared in shock at the bridge just in front of her. It was the bridge she had seen Ingrid on. Her gift didn’t come with an insutrction manual and she never knew where she would end up and Ingrid had an English accent so she had assumed she was in England. Or did she have an Australian accent? She couldn’t remember, but this was definitely the bridge. The memories were overwhelming and she wasn’t ready to fully embrace them. She backtracked to an Italian restaurant she had seen just before the bridge.
She ordered an Aperol Spritz and waited for the order to arrive. She felt a familiarity in the moment, it was not possible and she was sure it was just a messed up signal. Ingrid was just a lovely human and she had got confused, the whole universe had clearly got confused and this was a violation on her life. She had a plan and the plan could not be interrupted.
Amelia dared not look at the door, but she felt her arrive. She knew she was there and as much as she wanted to repel the energy, she couldn’t stop it. It swarmed around her, it was undeniable and she wanted to run.
Ingrid was radiant, the pain in her face was gone and the genuine warmth from three years ago was amplified. She was beautiful, she almost floated across the floor and Amelia could feel her. There was heat radiating between them, and the thermal energy in the room was palpable. Their souls had found each other again, they could not avoid it.
Ingrid took a seat on the stool next to Amelia.
‘I knew I would find you here. Now do you believe what you saw?’ Ingrid spoke with a new found confidence.
If anyone should believe in magic, Amelia should. She had seen the sorcery of the universe, but yet she could not accept the gift in front of her. She did not believe it was possible that she would ever find love, her purpose was to flit in and out of lives imparting a recovery signal. She was not meant to stay, but the connection to Ingrid was indisputable.
‘I’m only here for a week, I’m travelling,’ Amelia stuttered.
‘A lot can happen in a week. My goodness, a lot happened in an hour and I have a feeling this is just the beginning of a beautiful story. In fact, we both know it is the start of something – so why don’t you give in and let yourself experience some magic?’ A mischievous smile crept over Ingrids lips, and Amelia reached out her hand as their fingers entwined; just as they did in the vision.