It is day 4 of a ’semi-enforced’ work from home. I am attempting as much social isolation as possible. Mainly because some of my family and friends are in the high-risk group, so in the nicest possible way I have to stay the hell away from them for a bit. And I will. Because I am not an asshole (this is an introverts dream… I get to say no to everything and people don’t think I’m a prat). I decided I would keep a track of COVID-19 lockdown. So here is an exciting overview of day 3 of working from home.
I haven’t showered, I can’t even remember if I showered yesterday; I am sitting at my breakfast counter with a mild backache and wishing I had been more organised in the move and found proper homes for my possessions. I could have had a perfect little desk in my spare room to work from.
I really ought to shower, the stench of social isolation self pity is getting a bit much. I should probably not spend the day in my PJ’s again, I am surprised my work colleagues haven’t noticed in our keep in touch zoom calls, I guess this is the beauty of only being seen from the shoulders up.
I feel great. It’s amazing what a shower can do. I have popped the kettle on only to realise my Brazilian Bold and Vibrant Roast 4 has run out and I am instead left with my Lazy Italian Sunday Roast 2. It will be like being woken up with a slap around the face with a wet fish. FFS I’ll have to walk to Tesco.
Tesco only had an ample supply of the Lazy Sunday brew and no Brazilian Brute force Brew, so I bought a Diet Coke and some revels instead.
Just wrapped up an hour of video calls. I’m filled with a deep sense of belonging and love from my colleagues right now. Who needs to physically see anyone!? This Zoom stuff is great.
I am bored AF. There is nobody to talk to. Why did I ruin the ending of Turner and Hooch for my Year 6 teacher? Why? She looked so devastated when I told her. I was such a selfish 10 year old.
I have nailed 101g of revels in 2 hours and 21 minutes. I might add this to my list of achievements on my CV.
I wonder how much nutritional value is in 180g bag of Doritos Cool Original chips and a tub of Tesco Salsa dip? Is this sufficient for lunch? Should I have bought a sandwich when I went to Tesco this morning?
Oooo I can plug in my laptop to my TV. How exciting. I have two screens again!
Is it socially acceptable to have a beer? If I was invited to a work lunch I would probably have a pint… therefore it’s surely ok? Oooo but having a beer on your own at 2:15 pm might be frowned upon… but nobody would know…? 6 pm. 6 pm. You can do this.
Maybe I should go for a walk? But what happens if one of those imbeciles that bulk buys pasta and toilet paper walks by and coughs in my face?
Just 56 minutes to go. You can do this. Oooo I need some plates… maybe it’ll be worth a quick look to see if I can find some online.
Close enough to beer o’clock. Think I’ll have a beer.